tomatoes and the two cities

there is no joy like the joy of finding a gum wrapper that says "you are beautiful". yes. one needs reassurance. 24/7. anyways, so i was out with my mom getting groceries, and she almost fainted once she saw the price of tomatoes... "OMG! what happened to the tomatoes? theyve gone up 200%!" "well ma'am," said the vegetable guy, "we are purchasing them at these rates. See, we get the tomatoes from Wana, and the whole fighting going on there, with the afghan warlords giving themselves up, the prices have also risen." "umm... wait," i said. "so you are telling me, Afghan warlords are growing tomatoes in wana? "is thys it? is thys the end of tomatoes?" batman narrator voice: "stay tuned to find out!!!" in other news, i was going thru my journals of yore. yeah, yeah! like all 16-year-old hysterical females, i too had a "dear diary". if i were to summarize the contents, they would go somethyng like thys: whine, whine, whine, 'life sux' whine, whine, 'why me god?' whine, whine... i seriously couldnt sit thru the whole thyng and decided i didnt really WANT to know the person i was at 16. if i met someone like that NOW, i'd umm... shoot them :) those thyngs im burning as soon as i learn to strike a match. but one of the more interesting events i wrote about was a 'chess match' i won. on a trip to kashmir with my college friends, thys guy challenged me to a match. i being me, agreed. a) because i rather enjoy looking like a fool, and b) i usually never stop long enuff to consider the consequences of my actions. (that's never important) he had previously played 6 matches and was on a winning streak. the only thyng i knew about chess was that the horsey-piecy is called a knight. and the queen is the taller guy. that, and my brother was captain of his college chess team two years in a row. so anyways we sat down to a match, and as prophesized (rather ominously) by myself, i began losing pieces left right and center. it was like an out of body experience. as if i had floated out of my body and could see my pieces being lifted off the chequered board, from way up in the sky. a white light beckoned at the end of the tunnel. not one to give up without a fight, i... umm... well... erm... fought back. duh. "i remember it clearly now" soon the board was almost clear of both our pieces. i was left with three, and he four or five. i checked his king. he checked mine. i figured, the only dignified way out of thys was the stale mate. so i began working for that. move king, get checked, move again, get checked. as thys line of action ensued, we gathered quite a crowd. and then one genius called out: "woman, his king is facing a mate. look at your bishop and pawn." ummm...they have? 0_0 lol! whaddya know! THEY HAVE! I WIN! I WIN! I WIN! I WIN! *fireworks* muhahawhawhahawha. na na na na na na! i gave up chess after that. i mean, dude, i dont got the brains for it, and it's always cool to quit while yer ahead. besides, (unintentionally) beating the college champ at his game is no small feat. anyways, chess is for smart people. there's only so many games one can win thru sheer luck (and stupidity). (^.^)