happy birthday meeksinsky

im a bad, bad man. it's my darling's birthday today, and i didnt even remember... happy birthday meeks :) of the few good thyngs that came off thys blog, yer of the few topping the list :) *hugs* ------------------------------------------------ my birthday is in a couple of days. i accedently caught my brother planning a surprise birthday party for me. if that wasnt nough, i ended up deciding the guest list too *blush* :D and yer ALL invited :D but no seriously, all jokes aside... i'm feeling so weird. on the face of it... im so glad for friends who'd take time out to show. who care. on the other hand... ive been dying to scream out all day... but since i was surrounded by strangers, i didnt feel like creating a scene. i thought i'd call a friend or another, but i realised i wasnt looking for sympathy. and that's what i'd get from the ppl i came across in the last yr. those i knew before, i was too lazy to keep in touch with... and it kinda felt awkward to call up someone outta the blue under the influence of overactive endocrine glands. god bless meeks. and god bless the monologist. and god bless the zistahs(whove been outta reach, and im not about to forgive them for that anytym soon. but like all people, i guess theyve moved on too). i guess it's my fault if im finding it hard to connect with people. if im feeling like a bottomless pit, i could possibly call up someone and tell them right? but is it too much to ask of friends... or people who "care" to remember two important dates in my life? TWO? is that really that much to ask? i wish people would forget about my birthday. it;s a stupid day anyways. if you were to ask me for three important dates ... that meant anythyng to me ... my birthday wouldnt be one of them. anyways. maybe im asking too much. which doesnt change the fact that im about to bite someone's head off. i wish i could tell my friends to stay puttttttt in their homes... without coming out rude or offensive. i wish i could speak swahili.